For a shorter version read only between the asterisks (*).

*ICBC won lots of medals at BUCS.*

In the men’s intermediate pairs (MI2-) Danny Symmonds and Alex Gillies claimed the first medals of the competition for ICBC and cruised through the opening heat into the semi-final. The pair lined up in the final against Durham A, B, C and D and after hanging back for most of the race made their killer move within 100 metres to win by 0.12 seconds. Announcers were aghast at the brutal acceleration; “Wait… I think… yes! Imperial have taken the lead, can they have? Yes… Durham weren’t expecting this! No one was expecting this.” The duo was cool coming off the water attributing their win to “sheer skill”. The men’s lightweight double of Adam Freeman-Pask and Oli Mahony took pole position in their heat by 12.67 seconds. Durham again put up a good effort sacrificing Durham A, B and C to the IC crew in the final. When asked afterwards if it was a tough race there was much laughter: “No.”

With such a vast quantity of entries there was little time between races and several athletes had to sprint straight from one boat to another. The women’s intermediate quad (WI4x: Stainthorp/Duffy/Philips/Bromley) had to ignore impatient Marshals’ urging the crew to push-off while they awaited their stroke. Stainthorp had just crossed the finish in the beginner 8+ and had to dash into the quad. After a desperate push-off, bow Tamsin Bromley reported the steering to have ceased functioning. Already late the crew could not turn back and had to steer up to the start by pressure. Despite the rush the crew were passed in the opposite direction by their race at the 1500 metre mark and shouted at by another Marshal who took great pleasure in informing the crew of their misfortune. There was no time to wallow in self-pity as three of the crew members had to be back to race in the champ 8+ (WC8+). The 8+ was now also late as a result of having to wait for the quad members and after more seat-switching the crew (Hart/Symmonds/Graham/Thompson/Philips/Duffy/Rouse/Bromley) hastily made its way to the start line but suffered a shoddy performance as a result. Luckily all losing boats were sent to the repechage where the crew improved form enough to secure a place in the final, but were not strong enough to medal. Stern pair Louise Hart and Chloe Symmonds were already exhausted having won the opening heat of the intermediate pairs (WI2-) and missing out on gold in the final by 11 seconds.

The men’s intermediate quad (MI4x) of Tom Bell, John Dick, Matt Lunt and Andy Gordon finished third in their heat, second in their rep and fourth in the final behind winners Reading. Boatman Paul put the results of that race into perspective (and actually made the crew feel less disappointed), "2 novice scullers and 2 lightweights in a scratch crew managing to finish 4th... I think that's pretty good". Dick was appreciative of the comment: "It's the nicest thing I've ever heard him say." On Sunday John Dick and Danny Bellion teamed up for the intermediate doubles (MI2x) and finished second in their heat. Due to time restraints between races Tom Bell took the bow seat for the repechage getting them into a final where they finished fifth. Bell returned crestfallen and drenched from head to toe. As he dripped his way towards the tent there were muffled questions as to whether the crew had capsized during the race. “They must have, how could he be *that* wet?” When John appeared completely dry it was clear that Bell’s wetness was the result of a splashing Dick. Again.

In the women’s intermediate double (WI2x) Chloe Symmonds and Christina Duffy boated with ample time to warm-up and practise some starts. At the 1000 metre mark on the way to the start the collar from Symmonds’ stroke-side blade came loose and the boat had to make it’s way painfully back down the return lane to find a screw-driver. With time now slipping away the blade was re-geared and the crew set off at full pace to the start line. However the boat continually veered towards the bank on the way back up and by the 1500 metre mark it was concluded that the steering fin was still attached to the stern despite removing the foot steering earlier. Coach Ross Smitheman had been following on a bicycle and took pity on the traumatised crew. The boat pulled over to the bank and Smitheman waded into the lake to remove the fin mumbling something about killing Duffy if he got bird shit all over him. Sadly the crew were blown from lane 6 throughout the race and finished fourth missing the repechage by less than two seconds.

One of the few crews to have trained together was the men’s intermediate coxed four (MI4+). The four of cox Libby Richards, Iain Palmer, Richard Winchester, Bruce (Tom) Arnott & Gareth Brown won both their opening heat and semi-final but were pipped to pole position by Durham in the final and had to settle for silver.

The disappointment of the weekend went to Georgie Philips who despite winning a silver medal in the women’s beginner single sculls event (ahead of IC’s Ella Burroughes who claimed an impressive bronze) was devastated at not winning gold. As she made her way to the medal ceremony the official asked how her race went; a question he later regretted. Philips offered a cynical smile for the photo and headed back to the ICBC tent emotionally distraught. Comfort was sought from Bruce who offered an inspirational speech about how little things can mean a lot to some people and to be grateful of her silver medal. With a glazed eye and wistful stare across the lake he shared stories of his days down under with his mates and his rubber dinghy. “We loved that dinghy. Because it was our dinghy.” Silence befell the mini-bus as we clung to his every word. Philips left composed, smiling and uplifted. “Good onya! She’ll be apples”. As the door shut Arnott admitted “I’m not happy with my f-cking silver, let’s get real… this is shit, it’s all about the gold.”

When his race was cactus, Mallee bull Bruce spent much of the downtime slapping shrimps on the Barbie or playing aerial pingpong (AFL). Arnott was pensive for much of the weekend having recently returned from the outback. His father Crocodile Dundee (who operates under the pseudonym “Chris Arnott”) would have been proud of his son’s silver placing despite having a few kangaroos loose in the top paddock. There was more fatherly love from Henry Goodier’s dad (The Greater Good(ier)) who took control of the BBQ serving up the finest chicken, sausages and burgers the club has tasted. The Press Officer’s life was also threatened after taking a photograph of the man in action for fear of leaking recipe secrets. The BBQ was left in the tent overnight on Sunday and was nowhere to be seen on Monday morning. Underground mafia rebels from Lovere in Italy have since published a video claiming responsibility for the theft in reaction to the famine which still lingers post-training camp. The insurgency has become the new focus after a failed Free Tibet campaign in the village. ICBC non-student member Christina Matteotti (who has previously claimed mafia links) has been brought in for questioning.

There were plenty of Dingo’s breakfasts (a yawn, a scratch, a leak and a good look round (i.e. no breakfast)) before weigh-in for the men’s lightweight 8+ (cox Henry Fieldman/Ole Tietz/Adam Freeman-Pask/Andy Gordon/Matt Lunt/Oli Mahony/Patrick Hudson/Alex Gillies/John Beaty). Gillies seemingly irrepressible energy levels were fuelled in the preceding weeks by cups of tea and coffee, marshmallows, lollipops, honey sandwiches and cans of red bull in order to make weight. The IC crew won their opening heat over Durham A and B but were beaten to first place by a strong Cambridge crew in the final by a time difference of over 10 seconds.

The championship men’s lightweight quad event (MCLwt4x) saw Adam Freeman-Pask, Oli Mahony, Ole Tietz and Alex Gillies sail through the opening heat finishing a comfortable second. The crew made the classic error of confusing the women’s Empacher quad with the non-existent men’s lightweight quad. Bowman Gilles had to row feet-out for the race as he could not fit into the steering shoe.

Despite Steve’s email during the week claiming “it is unlikely to be wet” the sunny weather turned to rain on Monday and the wind picked up resulting in racing being temporarily postponed. All crews returned to the finish in time to witness four female Durham rowers being plucked from the lake as their coxless four sank underneath them. With no signs of improvement repechages were cancelled and finals were drawn based on fastest qualifying times. This left crews who had raced in slower heats out for the final, i.e. IC’s men’s intermediate 8+ who dominated their heat and finished first by rating 18 for the last 500 metres. Further racing in the beginner sculls was cancelled and gold was awarded to IC’s Patrick Hudson as fastest qualifier. Conditions slightly improved and finals were run in the evening. Erica Thompson and Louise Hart claimed silver in the women's championship double sculls (WC2x) event before jumping into the championship coxed four (WC4+) (cox: Richards/Hart/Thompson/Graham/Symmonds) and winning another silver for the club, without Captain Thompson having to sniper any of the Durham crews. Henry Goodier and Simon Hislop won bronze in the men's championship double sculls (MC2x), and the mens’ lightweight quad now racing in the larger BBG for stability (and shoes that fit), finished a respectable second.

With BUCS points in the bag it was time to return to London and crews finished racing for the day left the site with Johnny Handbrake at the wheel. A quick spin down to the start line seemed appropriate as did some “gentle” honking at IC finalist crews doing their warm-ups before racing. When ordered by a cycling Trappers to turn around, heads dropped in shame. Fearful of repercussions, Davey thought it wise to apologise to the Marshal on the way out. “Really sorry Marshal I didn’t realise there was no driving here. Terribly sorry about that.” Marshal: “I don’t really care.” Foot down, dust cloud, bye Nottingham. As this was a student-only event, Imperial’s “working” members remained in London to train. Ex-IC student Chris Pollock had fond memories of his time competing at Nottingham: “The sooner they turn Holme Pierrepont into a glass parking lot the better. I hate that place. Nuke the site from Orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.” This is exactly what happens when you get old and bitter.

Well done to all 52 students who contributed to the great results and showed good support over the weekend. Training is underway for the women’s squad who will be competing in Ghent next weekend as well as a men’s crew who will be racing in the Odra Cup in Poland. Good luck to all involved.

*Christina Duffy

Full BUCS results can be found here:

http://www.bucs.org.uk/page.asp?section=14591§ionTitle=Championships*